The Morning After the Night Before: A Guide to being Hungover

Good night out? If the answer is yes then you're probably hating life today. Am I right? Well, never fear, help is at hand to get you through this tough time in your life. 

Firstly, there are several types of hangover:

1. A slight headache (congrats) 

2. Headache and extreme tiredness (zzz)

3. Headache, tiredness and nausea (grim)

4. Headache, tiredness, nausea and fear of death (savage) 

You will know what category hangover you have as soon as you wake up by how your body feels. The category will also directly correlate to how you look. For example, if you wake up in last nights clothes or in nothing but your shoes, you're likely to be a category 3 or 4. If you still don't know how bad the hangover will be, check your phone. Categories 1 and 2 certainly won't have sent any embarrassing texts or tweets to angry flatmates or crushes whereas categories 3 and 4 will have confessed their undying love for their tutor over Twitter. Fantastic. 

If you are classed as either category 1 or 2 hangover then drink some water and eat salty food - you'll be fine. If it's 3 or 4 or you class it to be any worse then you are in a dire situation. Of course, it's made worse because it's self inflicted and therefore nobody feels remotely sorry for you. 

Categories 3 and 4 mean that movement is extremely limited due to the nausea. This also means you won't be able to tell hunger and nausea apart and from fear of being sick, won't eat or want to drink anything. I urge you to try and drink and eat something. You'll feel much more human, I promise. Carbs are always a good bet (pasta always gets me through it) but I'm sure I should be telling you to eat fresh fruit and veg (much healthier but the nuclear option is to choose carbs). 

Before food is consumed if you are nervous about vomming then I would try (I know it just be sooo hard for you) to get up and stand in the shower for a few minutes. You'll wash last night off you so you won't at least have to smell the alcohol anymore. 

The one positive to a hangover for a student is that you don't feel quite as bad lying in bed all day watching films. You're "ill" and therefore have an excuse. Also, you will be cheered up throughout the day when flashback memories from last night visit you. These usually involve you doing or saying something very stupid and embarrassing but you can always blame it on the alcohol! 

Just remember, you're not going to die evenif you feel like it. Just stick films on and eat some chips. In fact, that's a panacea for any problem you'll encounter in life. Keep calm and eat chips. 

A Guide to Thrift Shopping

Thanks to Macklemore and his associates, everyone and their dog has been obsessed with thrift shopping ever since his song came out. On this side of the pond, charity shops have long been linked to old ladies selling dusty old books and clothes for 50p. However, since the fashion shift to vintage happened a few years ago, anyone wanting to be known as 'retro' was shopping in Oxfams and Scopes across the country.Shops such as Beyond Retro are havens for anyone calling themselves a vintage fashion lover or an edgy hipster but their clothes do cost several limbs to own. This make the honest charity shop much more desirable even if it is less glamourous (although it makes the item much more unique). 

Rails and rails of vintage clothes that have potential to  be that one statement piece

The first thing to remember when sifting through thrift shops is that not every item is going to be bang on like a boutique thrift shop (e.g. Urban Outfitters) so you're going to have to dedicate some time to find the real gems. Also, there certainly won't be an awesome house soundtrack on in Oxfam unless you wear your headphones (but you don't want to be thought of as a 'yob' by the chairty shop elders). You will be confronted with rails and rails of colourful clothing that certainly don't look good put next to each other but accessorised well and paired with plain colours, it could be a beautiful, statement piece that can be recycled season after season.

The next thing to remember is that charity shops often do fantastic jewellery that has been donated. I have some fantastic real gold necklaces that work if I'm doing the hipster look or the vintage look. You do want to avoid looking like Mr T though, which is easily done if you go a little overboard on the gold. Other accessories like shoes can be quite hit and miss but handbags are often good quality and sometimes you can come across a Mulberry (if you live in one of the home counties, of course).

Thirdly, if you are an impoverished student wanting to keep up to date with the latest campus trend of being edgy but can't afford high street, head to the charity shops. Charity shops, if you're lucky, may have very similar 90s addidas sweatshirt that Urban Outfitters are selling for £40. Bargain and bang on trend - what more could you ask for?

Lastly, remember the motto "one man's trash is another man's treasure" so you can give back to charity any clothes you don't have a home for anymore and simultaneously possibly complete someone's outfit and make yourself feel good about donating. Win Win.

Guide to Boho Chic

I usually have a problem with any kind of style where the title ends in 'chic' disregarding it as pretentious and unnecessary. Strangely, this does not apply to 'Boho Chic' mainly because 'boho' on it's own sounds a lot like 'hobo' which conjures up images of dirty men in beanies and raincoats. The 'chic' reminds us that 'boho' is actually a very cool fashion style and lifestyle. You think 'bohemian' and you think of John Lennon, hippies and 'tortured artistes' with sunken cheeks and visible bones living in Soho on nothing but expensive gin and cigarettes for sustenance. Thankfully, to achieve a boho chic look, you don't have to do any of the above.

More extreme high-fashion version of the boho chic headband idea. Gorgeous.

To start with, you really should have long, straggly hair that can be contained under a hat (fedora-style) or headband (see above). If you need more inspo, look up Ms Yoko Ono back in her days spreading love and peace around with Lennon. You can also do a loose, messy plait anywhere on your head and it will be bang on boho trend. To be honest, a loose, messy hairstyle, whatever it is, will work incredibly well with this look. For extra boho chic points, add feathers hanging from your hair.

Other accessories include round sunglasses (again look for Lennon and Yoko), any clothing with a fringe detail and earthy coloured clothing (look for greens, blues and browns in particular). A handful of rings attached to each finger will also be bang on. For extra boho chic appeal, make sure they're from market stalls or at least look like they are - vintage is always a winner with this look. 

Shoe-wise it's always best to go for sandals (gladiators to put emphasis on the 'chic' or flip flops for 'boho'). It goes without saying that your nails should be painted or at least thought about before they go on show. for nail paint, you can go with bright colours if you want but neutrals or pastels are always best. 

When it comes to deciding what is most 'boho chic' in the wardrobe department, nothing screams boho chic like a full-length skirt. A full length skirt is summery, elegant and the loose fabric will make you feel more bohemian as you aren't constrained like you are with skinny jeans (without wanting to sound too Germaine Greer about it). Anything tie-dyed is also a fantastic way to nail boho chic. It leans slightly more towards the hippie end of the spectrum but still works. If you're struggling, just Google 'festival boho look' or (I hate to say it) 'Nicole Richie boho' (or Sienna Miller for a healthier option) and you'll see just how relaxed this style can be. The rule here is usually, anything goes.

From catwalk to camden, boho chic is an accessible, easy look that is cheaply achieved (Head to vintage or charity shops)

A boho chic look works any time of the year but mainly in summer and especially at festivals (I shall be alternating between boho chic [day] and hipster [night] at Glasto). If your hand isn't constantly shaped into a 'peace' sign, you're not doing it right.

A Guide to Teenage Girls

As much as I love boys, I am so glad I'm a girl. I'm 19 and, as a girl, was very glad to avoid the embarrassing voice breaking stage of male puberty, as well as patchy facial hair and usually, boys are significantly spottier than girls (thank the lack of showers). However, when it comes to female puberty, we women are born with an innate knowledge of what is to await us. All men, however, are born with an innate ability to ignore all female puberty warning signs and the inability to learn anything from our constant tantrums. 

The source of these constant tantrums are sadly known to nobody on this planet and probably nobody in the universe. They can cause a once lovely pig-tailed little girl who couldn't go anywhere without her favourite teddy into a screaming spawn of the devil himself who is willing to drag anyone and anything (pets included) into Hell with her. Sad but true. The worrying thing is that these can erupt at any time sometimes without any prior warning. This means that the tantrums are large and inevitable components of being a teenage girl therefore, I cannot guide any teenage girl or her family how to avoid such occurrences. 

Another component of being a teenage girl that comes hand in hand with the temper-tantrum is the stubbornness that only a teenager can have. This means that no teenage girl (or boy, for that matter) will ever apologise willingly, or often meaningfully, for anything they will have said or done in the temper-tantrum. The only guidance I can give you all is that the hormones are most likely doing this and that they will hopefully not be like that forever. Fingers Crossed.

The next stage that usually comes after some physical development is the first boyfriend or girlfriend. Obviously with a teenage girl having a girlfriend, the threat of pregnancy is removed but the threat of your precious daughter being broken-hearted "forever" is very real. The first boyfriend is usually quite an issue for most parents, especially fathers. Most teenagers will keep their first few week-long relationships from their parents but when the first serious one comes along, you're going to know about it. Often, the famed temper-tantrums become increasingly intrinsically linked to any slight argument with the beloved boyfriend. Now, fathers, I know what you're thinking: "who is this 'man' and what does he want with my daughter?". We all know that you know the answers to those questions so why do you bother asking them? We all understand you want to protect your little girl but be nice to the beloved boyfriend at least for the first time you meet him. Believe me, he will be so scared of you he wouldn't dare do anything to your daughter, so relax.

Soon, your daughter should return to a person you want to have dinner with every night which will relax everyone in the household. My only advice would be to let them get on with it. They'll thank you for it in the end. It's a hard time for everyone but make sure they've got enough chocolate and flowers. Girls love that.

Commes Des F**kdown: Guide to being Hipster

My outfit for a night out in Bristol. Taken from Instagram @hollyannarisdon. A crop top and an over-sized Levi's jacket  screams edge without desperate cries to be acknowledged.

Being hipster is easy, whatever your starting point. The place to start is your wardrobe. Boys and girls, invest in some vintage Levi's (stonewashed denim is essential) in jacket/high-waisted shorts form (but not worn together). Depending on your desired hipster intensity, ranging from moderate (there's no way you can be a little bit hipster) to off the scale, what you wear with your denim is essential. For obvious hipster but not too OTT, go for plain clothes (e.g. black, whites, slogan tees) and accessorise with some edgy jewellery. By 'edgy', I do not mean Primark or New Look. I mean charity shop or market stall - way less mainstream (remember, hipsters are just not mainstream). For moderate edge, go for some converse-style trainers or you could even stretch to some 90s-style Nike Airs for an even edgier look. Pair with ripped tights, denim shorts and over-sized colourful jumper for maximum hipster effect. You could also try some creepers (a quick Google can explain what they are if you're not sure). I've personally never been a fan of them but they add an edge to an outfit, even if they are stocked on the high street.

My Nike Airs - taken from my Instagram page @hollyannarisdon

Another hipster wardrobe staple is the beanie. A Commes des Fuckdown beanie or one with foreign words on it will help you achieve the really hipster look. It does need to be teamed with long-hair though (helping with the 'I-don't-care' attitude that I'll come onto later). A parka should also be invested in for true hipster 'I-go-to-warehouse-raves-every-weekend' style. For me, parkas only remind me of Frank Gallagher from Shameless which immediately turns me against them. 

For boys, a hair cut will edge you towards the hipster style. Go for short on the sides and longer on the top (I must say, a bit like Danny from The Script - but nobody has to know you asked for his cut in the hairdresser). Team this with a turtle neck jumper (patterned or plain will work), some rolled up jeans and some vans/converse style trainers. The obvious buttoned-up shirt will help you fit in anywhere. This shirt can actually come from anywhere nowadays with high street jumping firmly on the hipster bandwagon but charity shops and vintage dens will always result in the best buys.

Your style should scream that you 'don't really care' what you look like even though it's quite obvious you do. This means your attitude must be bang on as it's just as important as style. By attitude, I don't mean pretending you have an ASBO or an 'attitude problem'. By attitude, I mean your outlook on life. If you're hipster, you don't get easily stressed, often helped by the amount of green they smoke. I am now going to say that drugs are definitely not a prerequisite of being a hipster. In fact, it's probably more hipster and anti-mainstream to not do drugs - bear that in mind. You often see hipsters surrounded with other hipsters suggesting they are easy people to get on with. They also share interests of course such as warehouse raving or any other non-mainstream place (I recently encountered some of the most hipster people I've ever seen at a live Jazz night in Sheffield).

Don't be scared, you do not have to like staying up all night dancing in a derelict warehouse being covered in sweat that's dripping from the ceiling. To be a true hipster though, you really must avoid the mainstream clubs. Sorry if that's a shock for you and it's a free country but mainstream clubs will not welcome beanies as party attire and would prefer to see girls wearing nothing but heels and a 'dress' that makes them look like streetwalkers. Certainly not a hipster look. However, if you are interested in the warehouse experiences, check around on Facebook for those kinds of events or just Google warehouse clubs in your city. Motion, Timbuk2 and sometimes Thekla are great nights out in Bristol. There are great clubs in every city for this sort of thing. To be honest, anywhere that sells Red Stripe (that's all you can drink now, by the way - unlucky) for a ridiculously high price is allowed on the hipster list. 

If hipster is your style or you want to be more hipster and this blog hasn't helped, leave a comment and I'd be glad to update. See 'Acceptable in the 90s' in this blog or the sister blog (http://embellishmental.blogspot.co.uk) for further advice. 

Cooking up a Storm

Your cupboards are empty and you are trying to find recipes involving mayonnaise and half a red pepper on Google. This means you must go to the nearest supermarket and fill up several plastic bags with food to load on yourself like a camel before trekking home. As if this wasn't stressful enough, now you actually have to cook for yourself. Once your cupboards and fridge shelf are gloriously filled, you are on the road to dedicating many Instagram posts to your food you deem to be gourmet but is only really a stir fry (the meal that got me through first year). Other key meals include Spag Bol or, indeed, anything where the key ingredient is pasta.

Just a salad but look how Instagrammable. 

If you do want to cook some healthy meals, you can delve into the realms of the famed Student Cookbook that you've definitely been given by well-wishing family friends. The main problem with this is that you will never have all of the ingredients needed to make even a vague copy of the pristine picture in the book. To avoid this, you'll have to go shopping with the meal you want to make in mind which means one thing: organisation. This is something we students are not world-renowned for so unless you have a deadline you haven't planned for and will therefore organise the 24 hours before that deadline like a military operation consisting of a savage fight for a library computer and surrounding vending machines. However, unless your student cookbook is from Waitrose, none of the recipes will require anything other than essentials (i.e. no Cumin or Tarragon) so what you've managed to buy that wasn't crisps and chocolate should create some sort of meal. Your cookbook will mainly consist of stir frying vegetables with miscellaneous, interchangeable meat and many noodle dishes. Sadly, it doesn't matter how good a cook you are or how well you stuck to the recipe, you will never be able to make the food look as good as the photo even with the best choice of Instagram filter. You will also be stuck with a flatmate who is more skilled than your parents in the kitchen which you will inevitably want to avoid unless they are offering to roast plenty of food for you with minimal charge. Then they are your best friend. It is likely that this all-knowledgeable flatmate will cook with vegetables and salad which automatically makes that internet-friendly. Even a salad garnish will make any meal look infinitely healthier and therefore more Instagrammable (apart from chicken nuggets/fish fingers and chips - I'm afraid that will never look healthy). My only problem with Instagram posts of food is the accompanying hashtags (e.g. #instafood, #instagood and even #instachicken and all other hashtags starting with 'insta'). I also have the problem of eating all of the meal in one mouthful if it was worthy of Instagram because it just looks so damn good before being able to take a photo.

Don't fret if you can only cook up beans/cheese on toast or a jacket potato, Instagrammable meals will come with time and by the 3rd semester, you'll think you're Nigella/Jamie but better because you're a student and therefore cooking on a budget. My flatmate recently discovered Marmite pasta when he had bare cupboards and it's not half bad. So stock up on pasta and noodles and get creative. 

Acceptable in the 90s

So you've come to university and found that everybody is dressing like Will Smith (Feat DJ Jazzy Jeff) but somehow pulling it off in the same way. Even your once loved H+M and Topshop are stocking hipster baggy t-shirts and backing the acceptable-in-the-90s double denim clash. Maybe this isn't your style and that's fine but it does need explaining as to why double denim, in particular, is making a pathetic comeback (like most of the bands from that era now are - "we just love making music" = "we just love making money").

We can only hope that we do not look back at photos of our university time and cringe like we do at the awful 90s children clothes (e.g. dungarees and bright colours) out parents dressed us in. Although a lot of the fashion is very similar with the return of scrunchies and high-top trainers. Interestingly and in the only time of fashion I can remember, you can actually wear anything and not really go far wrong from the 90s trend. This is probably because 90s fashion was that awful that anything goes (or everyone was too drugged up to notice what they covered their physical dignity with). If you really are stuck for how to get involved in this trend then it's simple: an over-sized denim jacket is key and will add a 90s twist to your outfit (Urban Outfitters have some fab vintage Levi's in at the moment). It doesn't have to be faded denim (see photo above) and the pink hair is not essential. The next purchase you'll need to make will involve a sports shop and some Nike Airs (or any other brand of high tops you prefer). I know what you're saying, Nike Airs and Levi's jackets cost a lot of money but they'll last a while and this trend isn't going anywhere anytime soon for us students. In fact, I'm not sure it ever left as it's always been quite a student-attitude and style of 'I don't care'.

The next and equally essential component is jewellery or anything you can hang from your neck or wrap around your wrists or fingers. By this I mean, don't you dare think about cutting off that disgusting Reading Festival band from 3 years ago (even though a Glastonbury band would've been trillions cooler) as it now forms part of your student identity. I'm talking any bracelet you find unless it's a 'shagband' - they will never be acceptable again. If you don't know what I mean then you were not born in the 90s. What I mean is that you should find a market with a jewellery stall (the Guildhall markets in Bath are great for that with homemade earrings from 99p) and stock up on lots of cheap and unique, edgy jewellery. As many ear piercings the better, by the way. The only problem with coating your wrists in crap is that putting jackets on, no matter how over-sized, becomes quite problematic and you end up looking like Nemo with a gammy fin whilst trying to stay 'hipster' and cool. Also, because the hipster look is being stocked on the high street and 12-year old New Look shoppers call themselves hipster, the hipster style has to come from your attitude. This doesn't mean you need to revert to mimicking Harry Enfield and only say 'Yes/No Mrs Patterson'. The typical hipster is usually very chilled out, sociable and tranquil (apart from when you can barely see their dilated pupils buried in a Commes des Fuckdown beanie in a warehouse).

My version of hipster. Yes, the scarf is actually a 'kanga' from Tanzania which I bought on my Gap Yah. Oh so hipster.

I therefore hope this guide can help any confused souls out there by showing how to rock a 90s look. If still confused, get some denim, some jewellery some high tops, a beanie or two and a scrunchie and you're ready to go. If this isn't your style, don't force it but just be thankful this aspect of the 90s is surrounding you and not leopard print cat suits à la Scary Spice. Hopefully that will never be exhumed.